At War

July 31, 2006 at 9:20 am 3 comments

 I’m living in a war-zone, on many different fronts. I moved to
Israel over a month ago to be a part of a medical treatment plan that is unavailable in the USA. An extra bonus to this all has been having much more family around me – especially cousins, who mean the world to me and have everything to do with my *new* and improved chances at recovery.

On Sunday, my cousin was drafted back into the army to serve his reserve in Southern Lebanon. Haven’t heard from him in a few days… and as I sit with his wife and three young daughters, I am reminded by the new flash on the TV that we are in the middle of a war zone.

Last Friday, I decided to go to the Kotel. I was just looking to take a walk, really, and ended up there – although unconsciously I was clearly walking in that direction since I started out of my apartment. Walking through the old city and down the stairs, I was totally unaware of the Shabbos hustle around me. I felt like I had ear plugs in my ears and blinders on my eyes – until I stepped up to the hand-washing station and all of a sudden I wondered, “why did I come here?”

I washed my hands and walked to the front of the women’s section. Kissed the warm stone and took a step back – bumped right into a Hasidic girl my age. She was in the middle of her prayer, crying, and with her fist at her chest so tight that her knuckles are white. As a general rule, you don’t interrupt someone’s prayers – but she started to shake and I forgot my manners and asked her if she needed to sit down. She looked up and was surprised to see me (as most Israelis are at the sight of an Asian girl speaking Hebrew). She didn’t answer my question, but she asked me why I was there instead. Almost as if she expected me to know why she was there. I asked her, “what are you praying for?” And she explained to me that she was recently married and her husband was now in reserves in the North. She asked me again, “why are you here?” and I replied, “I’m not sure.” She said, “I am.” And she wrapped her arm around mine – the arm who’s hand held her prayer book – and she finished her prayers – as I started mine.

 I always thought that feeling alone was the result of being a KAD. But being here, I never felt so un-alone. I think that is the result of being at war…


Entry filed under: Random Thoughts.

On Asian Adoption A wiseman once asked me…

3 Comments Add your own

  • 1. John  |  July 31, 2006 at 8:45 pm

    be careful baby…

  • 2. Sara  |  August 2, 2006 at 8:42 am

    You are a far better Jew than I or most Jews I know (including some very superficially devout) – you deserve to feel a sense of belonging.

    (by the way, I have a very troubled relationship with my own Judaism, and though no one to look at me would ever question it, I have never had that sense myself.)

    Your story above is very beautiful.

  • 3. Margie  |  May 15, 2008 at 11:39 am

    Two women, unknown before then, come together to support each other. I think this is the definition of humanity.


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It’s just not that black & white. Not because I am taking a stand against. Just because, the issues I face are somewhere in the grey area and to weed through them, I blog. I blog. ~

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